The British are not alone in having a hundred ways of saying “Yes” when we mean “No”.
One of the most effective (and irritating) is the “Yes, but…” formulation, especially when it’s used in response to hearing a new idea for the first time. It has the trappings of positive response, with the sting in the tail. It can sound open-minded without being.
In 1934 the Czech writer, Karel Capek, wrote a piece entitled “About But-people”:
“If you tell them that two twos are four, they will promptly reply with a certain superiority ‘Yes, but, my friend, two threes are six’,” wrote Capek. “Whereupon they leave you feeling satisfied they didn’t yield a point.”
But-people, he concludes, “are by nature poor conductors, so the passing of communication disappears in them.”
“Yes, and…” can be so much more useful - often leading to productive problem-solving.
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